Lists about things and other stuff

5 moments in history that you’d think are made up

“No, that didn’t really happen. You made that up!” We all know people who are trying to sell us a tall tale as a fact, only to laugh at us once we buy the story. But life is weird. History is full of events that make you go: “Wait, what?” That’s why we’re writing about a few moments in history that you’d think are made up, but aren’t.

The Cheese Riots of 1766

See what I mean? This sounds like the type of event that the writers for Blackadder would add to Edmund Blackadder’s speech about the ridiculousness of something or the other as a reference. “Baldrick, there hasn’t been a military action as ineffective as the one you just attempted since the mayor of Nottinghamshire tried to stop the Cheese Riots of 1766 only to get knocked unconscious by a rolling wheel of cheese.” Yet, weirdly, the only thing made up in that sentence is the part about Baldrick. There were Cheese Riots in Nottinghamshire in the year of 1766. The mayor did try to stop them. He got knocked unconscious by a rolling wheel of cheese. It started because a bunch of merchants from another town tried to buy up a large part of Nottinghamshire’s cheese supply. Since there was a food shortage, the locals wouldn’t have it and rioted. This is one of those moments in history that make you go “wait a minute…” By the way, can someone convince Rowan Atkinson to record that sentence?

Selling the Bridge of London to an American

If you’re a little familiar with the moments in history that include con artists, the selling of bridges is right up there on your list of scams to look out for. Famously, George C. Parker sold a bridge in Brooklyn over and over again, even though he didn’t own a bridge in Brooklyn. Or any other bridge for that matter. Selling the Bridge of London pretty much just sounds like a UK version of this American scam. But it did happen. The London Bridge got sold for 2.4 million dollars to an American oil tycoon in 1968. It was subsequently shipped to Arizona in pieces. It’s been reassembled and is now a landmark in Lake Havasu.

The war with only one shot

Typically, wars last a while. The cold war lasted decades. The two world wars lasted several years. There’s a 100 year war and an 80 year war, and a number of other wars that were measured in decades rather than years. A war with only one shot just sounds like your friend’s drinking match with some guy without any from of alcohol tolerance – who forgot to have dinner before taking the dare to boot. But in the aftermath of a few greater European wars there’s a lesser-known war called “The Kettle War”. The Holy Roman Empire sought to claim access to the Dutch river “Scheldt” on the 8th of october 1784 and sent three ships convinced that the Dutch wouldn’t dare intervene. The Dutch Republic wasn’t having any of it and fired a few warning shots. When these got ignored the only shot in this war was fired. It reportedly hit a soup kettle. The Emperor’s ships surrendered. The war that followed was short-lived: only the fort of Lillo (at the time a vegetable garden) was invaded by the Austrian army and negotiatons were opened almost immediately.

Playing tennis on the wings of a flying airplane

As far as moments in history go, this one doesn’t sound like just a made up thing. It sounds like an absolute nightmare. I don’t know how it is for people without a fear of heights, but I’d imagine playing a ball game on the wings of a flying airplane would scare everyone. It sounds like some daredevil version of a WII-game rather than a thing that anyone would actually attempt. And weirdly: it happened. In 1925 two women played tennis on the wings of plane at a 1000 meters height. And though both of them were parachutists and pilots, so they knew what they were doing, neither of them even wore a parachute. It did make them rich, though, as a photo of this extremely dangerous game of tennis was sold around the world.

Without even a parachute

The concert 994 feet under the sea

This is just something from a Disney cartoon, right? Sebastian conducting an orchestra of clams or whatever, playing jazz to the Little Mermaid. Of course the Little Mermaid doesn’t give a fuck, as she’s horny and predominately interested in having sex with some prince on the shore. Love at first sight? Gimme a break. Ariel is horny enough to give up her voice just to get some. She’s slick, wet and ready for some dry land friction. What I’m saying is: if the Little Mermaid’s collection of human junk had included a satisfier, this fairy tale would have taken an entirely different turn. Anyway, there actually was a concert 994 feet under the sea. In 2006 Katie Melua played a gig in the dining area of the leg of a drilling platform, setting the world record for the deepest concert below sea level.


10 things wrong with the Sonic trailer

Can we talk about the Sonic trailer for a moment? You know the one. Where one of our most beloved game characters is brutally butchered into a CG abomination that makes us want to boil out our eyes. Here are ten things wrong with the Sonic trailer. We insist you watch it before reading this list.

Click here for the trailer. Note from author: this blog was written on may 3th 2019. There is a possibility the look of Sonic will have been updated to a less… cringeworthy version by the time you read this.

1 Sonic

There are so many things wrong with the design of this character alone, we could make a Ten things wrong with Sonic list. But we won’t. Just look at it. Look.

We have played the game, of course, we have even watched the cartoon, back in the day. Nothing could prepare us for this kind of misrepresentation. The game character has evolved as the computers progressed, but how someone came to design this version of Sonic is beyond us. Look at his body, his teeth, his fur… Everything is just… wrong! That’s why this is the number one spot. The funny thing is that the internet, led by Xennials and Millenials, sort of imploded after this hyperactive trailer came out and Jeff Fowler replied on Twitter. There might be some improvements on Sonic, but the internet doesn’t forget.

2 Gangsta’s Paradise

Are you kidding us with this song? Coolio’s Gangsta’s Paradise in a Sonic the Hedgehog movie? This song about a guy living in the ghetto is so wrong in a movie about a blue hedgehog, there are no words. This was the theme song for the nineties movie Dangerous Minds, with Michelle Pfeiffer, as you might recall. This 24-year old rap hit just doesn’t fit anywhere in a Sonic movie. When Weird Al Yankovic parodied the song, Coolio was very much not pleased. We don’t know his opinion about the use of the song now, but we raised all of the eyebrows.

3 Jim Carrey

We’re not sure if the batshit crazy (and in our opinion very depressed) JC will either save or wreck this monstrosity, but time will tell. In the trailer his representation of Dr. Robotnik (who should be called Dr. Kintobor before changing into the bad guy, but who’s keen on backstory anyway…) is as obnoxious as only Jim Carrey can play. Imagine the Cable Guy, but without the lisp, merging with Lloyd Christmas doing ‘the most annoying sound in the world’ and you’re kind of there. We are cringing in advance. His initial look is off, but we see the endresult in the very last shot. At least they got the ‘stache right.

4 The slo mo guided missiles scene

At one point in the trailer Dr. Robotnik fires off a buttload of guided missiles towards Sonic. (He has to destroy him, of course. Oh, please tell us how. Dr. Robotnik is probably be the real hero of this movie.) Sonic pulls a move we have seen in multiple movies; looking at his watch first, going überfast to redirect the missiles and saving the day. We saw Hammy doing the exact same thing in Over the Hedge, as well as Quicksilver in X-Men; Days of Future Past. Oh, and Jim Carrey as the Mask when he throws Cameron Diaz in the air. It’s kind of a plot hole as well, because in the first few seconds a cop sees Sonic go 760mph. But sure. Sonic goes faster than the speed of missiles.

5 Failing to hide the creature

The protaginist has to sneak the weird creature in somewhere. Sounds familiar? That’s because it is. Roger Rabbit was sneaked inside a bar trashing around and speaking loudly in the trench coat of detective Eddie Valiant. (A detective is kind of like a cop, right?) And nobody noticed. In the Sonic trailer cop Tom tries to sneak the blue abomination in in a duffel bag. Sonic doesn’t shut up, of course, making it an awkward situation for the poor cop doing his best not to be caught with a wanted creature.

6 James Marsden

Don’t get us wrong, we love James Marsden. We’d eat some rusk with this guy, given the chance. Wether he plays Cyclops in an X-men movie, a handsome writer in 27 dresses or a television host in Hairspray, he’s fine. Marsden is a decent actor and quite a talented singer, did you know? He can pull off a nice Sinatra. But that’s besides the point. To carry this load of crap is just an insult to an actor of his caliber. And he plays a cop. Cliché.

7 The military

There should be a rule number about this. In movies, if there is SOMETHING, the military gets involved. Transformers, a planet with Unobtainium, aliens, it doesn’t matter. And there is always this unremarkable, snarky, bad tempered Major / Colonel / High Ranked guy. In this trailer his name is Bennington and he’s só generic, we kind of fell asleep. Watching Jim Carrey talk over him in a done-to-death underminig way multiple times was just annoying, not funny.

8 Sonic the alien

Sonic: “Basically it looks like I’m gonna have to save your planet.”

So Sonic is an alien in this story? He wasn’t an alien in the original game and other adaptations. He was from Mobius, which was generally earth in the future, so an alternate version of earth, but still earth. Also, he lived with his 5 sisters and mother in Nebraska under a hegde. But now he has to ‘save the planet’. *sigh* This probably explains why the military is involved: aliens.

9 “Meow.”

Oh, come ON. Can we get a good guy and a weird creature meeting without it being this stupid? We’ve seen it, guys. In all the movies. The protagonist meets the weird creature(s), screams or whatever and the creature says something ‘funny’. In this case it’s “Meow.” Ha. Ha. We kind of expexted the voice of Ryan Renolds. Apparently this is a nod to Sonic X, where Chris mistakes Sonic for a cat. In animation people are really really dumb, mistaking BLUE HEDGEHOGS for cats and creepy ass blue aliens for dogs.

10 Portals

In a very short part of the jam packed trailer we see Sonic throw a golden hoop and two people fall through it, like a portal. A closer look reveals that it’s James Marsden and a woman, probably Tika Sumpter. Of course there is a stupid romance sub plot nobody cares about in garbage like this. Portals are a great deus ex machina in movies, to save the heroes in the nick of time from splattering on a sidewalk. Can we get a portal out of this movie?


Ten tips to sucker punch your procrastination

Reading this article will cost you three minutes which you could also spend working. Interested? Then you’re most definitely the type of person who could use these tips against procrastination.

You know how it goes. You have work to do, but all kinds of other things seem to pop up. Instead of just doing the job, you get sidetracked by little things and procrastination is the result.

It’s not satisfying to look back at your day and come to the conclusion that you wasted your time on crap. However, there are things you can do to get yourself going. It’s a battle, but you can win. Here are ten tips for you to sucker punch your procrastination in the gut and get stuff done.

1 Be aware of procrastination

Not everyone even notices he or she is procrastinating. When you become aware of something, you can work on it. That is the first step.

2 Remove distractions

Damn that smartphone. All your friends and the entire internet in the palm of your hand. Put the device out of reach, as far away as possible, to lessen the temptation to check it. Also, turn off every single notification. Try to remove all other things in your vicinity that might distract you.

3 Non-negotionables

Decide what your ‘non-negotionables’ are for the day. If that is one particular task, write it down on a post-it or something and put it in your field of vision. When you finished the non-negotinables, you’ll see the threshold for other tasks has become a lot lower.

4 Five minute start

Take five minutes to actually start with your task. Stay focused those five whole minutes and the likelyhood of your brain committing to completing it is higher. Sometimes it’s your brain that needs a kickstart. Five minutes of concentration can do the trick.

5 Cut it in pieces

One big ass cake is not easy to eat. If you cut it into pieces and finish one slice at a time, you can still finish the cake. This sucks as dietary advice, but it’s a great way to manage large and complicated tasks. Try cutting up the task in smaller bits. Multiple small bits make a whole. And if not, at least you managed to finish a part of it.

6 Be realistic

It can be tempting to set your expectations too high. If you have a task involving nine parts, for instance, be realistic about what you’ll be able to complete in a day. If three parts is reasonish reasonable, set your goal at ‘at least three’.

7 Scratch ‘I have to’

Saying ‘I have to’ over and over will not improve your mood. If you change it to ‘I choose to’ or ‘I want to’, you take control and responsibility. It’s all about mindset in the end.

8 Look at the consequences

Wat are the consequences of putting off your tasks? If anything, the first consequence is how you feel about yourself. Feeling like a lazy procrastinating loser is not the best feeling in the world when there’s stuff to do.

9 Look at the benefits

Take a look at the benefits of finishing your task. How will you feel when it’s done? Your mind will be more at peace, the task is, you know, done, and probably somebody else also benefits from your work. Focusing on the positive is always best.

10 Use a ‘helpline’

Ask someone, a friend or colleague, for instance, to help you. He or she can ask you whether you finished your task at a set or random moment during the day. Or check up on how far you are. A little pressure or control can work wonders.

These tips might help you battle procrastination. If you indeed manage to finish the task, reward yourself. You’ve earned it.

Sierra Burgess

Sierra Burgess is a Loser: another ugly duckling story

Netflix movie ‘Sierra Burgess is a Loser‘ is the classic tale of the ugly duckling falling for the handsome jock-guy. In this cliché riddled modern teen drama the high school ‘kids’ are, as always, in their twenties and speaking like they have an autocue nearby. Fact: in real life people do not. And we never have. If you’re planning on watching Sierra Burgess, SPOILER ALERT.

Believe me, we like the ugly duckling story just as much as any other former ugly duckling, but it’s getting so damn stale by now. Truth be told, the ending was clear within the first ten minutes. If you mix She’s All That, Ten Things I Hate About You, Mean Girls and 13 Reasons Why, you’re pretty much there. Except the supposedly losery girl is actually quite obese in this movie, in stead of a damn supermodel wearing glasses or overalls. But Sierra is witty and intelligent as fuck, of course. And beautiful, in her own way. Of course. And she can sing. There is some Cyrano in there as well. (Or, Roxanne, which is basically the same story.)

We can sum up this movie in two sentences. 1 Witty Fat Girl is texting and calling Handsome Guy, who thinks he’s texting and calling Dumb Pretty Mean Girl. 2 After some obvious misleading misunderstandings Mean Girl turns to Nice Girl and Witty Fat Girl gets Handsome Guy.

Real life

As someone who actually was that ugly (albeit slender) loser girl between the age of 4 and 15, this movie pisses me off. The volume of unrealistic bullshit is staggering and the amount of teen romcom drama cliches curled my toes. No, Netflix. It doesn’t work like that in real life. Not in the late nineties, not today. No matter how witty or smart you are, you never get The Guy if there is a more pretty girl around who is also witty.

As a pretty okay-ish looking adult, I actually asked my ‘The Guy’ what that pretty girl had that was so damn special. “Nothing.” he said, “I don’t even remember her. I remember you more than I remember her.” It was quite satifsying to meet him after I grew into a normal adult, to be honest. It is also *very* satisfying to see that the popular girls who bullied me have turned into unattractive fat housewives… but I digress.

Back to high school drama. Real life doesn’t work like all those movies and series show us. It’s rare to be the ugly duckling and actually turn into that swan. Or rather a normal, happy, healthy duck. Quack.

Fake versus real: a list of things

I’m going to make a list about the… lets call them ‘Fake High School Romance Drama’s’. I have named a few movies (and another Netflix-serie) which are similar to Sierra Burgess is a Loser. Which boxes do they tick off and what is the difference with real life?

1 Age of the actors

The young actors having to play high schoolers are mostly in their early- to midtwenties, something that sticks out like a sore thumb. Of course we’ve seen this in Grease, when a 30-year old had to play 17. Come on, Hollywood. Is it so hard to find decent actors who actually look like teenagers? Apparently. The massive Shannon Purser, who plays Sierra (and Barb in Stranger Things), is born on june 27, 1997, which means she was at least 20 at the time SBiaL was filmed.

2 Way of talking

I’ve said this earlier. The way the ‘kids’ talk is way too mature and witty. Nobody talks the way the teenagers do in movies and series. The worst might be Ellen Page as Juno, (Juno) who talks like she’s reading a philosophy book out loud all the time. In real life we mess up our lines. We stutter or shut down. We talk like human beings, especially when we’re teenagers. Okay, we may get a few good lines every now and then, but it’s mostly improvising the crap out of everything.

3 Peer groups

The jocks, the losers, the cheerleaders… It appears people fall into very sharp categories in Fake High School Romance Drama’s. Real high school is less divided, at least where I’m from. Birds of a feather flock together, so you probably have some things in common with your friends, but in my experience it’s not that extreme. The majority of us don’t really fall in any category anyway.

4 Adults

The parents and/or teachers in the FHSRD’s are mostly divided into two groups: understanding and cool or aloof and dense. They appear to be completely oblivious to the lives and struggles of their kids/students, giving the most unhelpful advice or grounding someone for no apparent reason. Adults in the real world are just people, in stead of stereotypes. Personally I have never even heard of someone who was actually grounded.

5 The same story

All those stories have the same premise. There is a high school where nearly everyone is ridiculously pretty. (Have you seen the actors and extra’s in 13 Reasons Why? My. Effing. God. It’s like a model bomb exploded over there.) There is an unpopular girl, she falls for a handsome guy and there are popular kids who act like assholes. In the end the unpopular girl overcomes her loserness and the mean ones learn their lesson. In real life this does not happen. Mostly because the mean jerks don’t even realise what assholes they are and ugly losers just don’t get their overly goodlooking love interests. They get other ugly losers and that’s okay.

6 Prom

I’m sure you can name at least 3 scenes involving a prom. Carrie, anyone? The ugly duckling is wearing a lovely dress and has transformed into the beautiful swan she was meant to be. The love interest is stunned by her new appearance, after which there is a shared dance and/or kiss. Don’t we just love extreme make overs… In reality nobody suddenly shines like a diamond at the prom. Either they were good looking to begin with or they stayed themselves, but in a better outfit.

7 Happy ending

Most endings are happy ones. Well, except for 13 Reasons Why, of course, but that’s a whole other story. In reality there is no end. Life doesn’t magically stop after the prom. Most people don’t end up with their high school sweethearts anyway and the naive ones that did, have turned into single parents by now. I’m quite glad I didn’t marry one of my high school sweethearts. The thing is: you’re a child and your brain and personality are in no way finished before the age of 25. So it’s fine to date and to learn what you want out of a significant other before tying the knot. There are no end credits in real life.

Why so serious? It’s a movie, Wordy!

I hear you. In reality the guy would be appalled, hurt and offended by the blatant catfishing the girls pulled off. But this is a movie, so the pretty guy takes the loser girl to prom. Of course things are totally unrealistic in movies, because we enjoy watching the FHSRD’s. We root for the loser to get the guy and we wish we could indeed turn out crazy pretty at our prom. I’m not saying I didn’t enjoy watching Sierra Burgess is a Loser, but it was just so painfully predictable. I said: “Both of you.” out loud at the exact moment the pretty boy did. Every plottwist came at the exact moment I expected it and the end was precisely as all those other movies. (Except for the obese thing, but the guy said he liked that. Real women have curves, y’all! If curves mean having your belly hanging over your belt… Muffin-tops are the new six pack, I guess.)

I’d like to see a FHSRD where the actors are actually teenagers, where not everyone is beautiful and where the lead just gets over his or her crush and goes on with life. We at Reasonish did and we turned out pretty fine.

Roll credits.

By the way

The title is stupid. Sierra does very well in school and she has a sweet best friend who’s there for her. She’s a tutor, she speaks multiple languages, she plays an instrument, she can sing and her parents are caring, wealthy, succesful and happily married. Sierra may be unpopular, but she is NOT a loser. You can also watch are you the one season 10 if you are interested.


The One About F*R*I*E*N*D*S (part 1)

Let’s talk a little about our most beloved sitcom from the nineties (and naughties): F*R*I*E*N*D*S. Who doesn’t know the romantic adventures of Monica, Ross, Rachel, Chandler, Phoebe and Joey? It’s hard to believe that the first episode aired almost 24 years ago. The show has stood the test of time however, and Netflix now gives us the chance to binge Friends in an okay-ish resolution.

There’s a lot, A LOT to talk about when it comes to Friends, and because I’m an expert, this post will be part one of an unspecified number of posts.

Recurring names

I started binging again recently and I came across some recurring names. This is some intense fangirl-stuff, mind you, after watching all ten seasons dozens of times and being able to talk along with most episodes, so don’t be alarmed. True Friends-fans will get the references though.

In real life you encounter people who have the same name, but in series this is a very rare occurance. You almost never see two Erics, for instance. (Although the name Eric For(e)man appears in both House and That 70’s Show.) Friends doesn’t shy away from reusing names however. It’s very possible some of these names pop up even more often, but these are the ones I could find so far. Let us know if you have spotted more!

1 Julio
Monica’s Italian fling from the diner and the cat Phoebe thinks is the spirit of her dead adoptive mom. Ross makes her take the cat back, but not before apologising to it.

2 Kate Miller
Joey’s curly haired crush who leaves for General Hospital and the nametag Rachel gets in Barbados.

3 Emily (three times)
The name Ross finds in the Big Book of Childrens Names when Rachel freaks out about how serious their relationship becomes and Ross’ English wife, who leaves him after he said the wrong name at the altar. Also, Rachel’s sister Amy thinks Emma’s name is ‘Emily’ at some point.

4 Mark
Rachel’s collegue Ross is jealous of in The One With All The Jealousy and one of the names Chandler mentions he might pick in stead of Chandler Bing. He has to choose between Mark Johnson or John Markson. Of course this is a clever ruse to get Phoebe to name one of the triplets Chandler, which works.

5 Josh
The fratguy Rachel dates to make Ross jealous. He steals from her and Monica, but he’s cute. Rachel gets a crush on a customer at Bloomingdales who is named Joshua. Ross undermines him by calling him ‘Josh’.

6 Jack (three times)
Ross and Monica’s dad, the dead guy from the funeral Monica and Phoebe cater at and Sting’s son.

7 Phyllis
An aunt of Ross and Monica. “She’s with PopPop and Aunt Phyllis now.” and the nickname Chandler gives Phoebe when she keeps writing about him and Monica. “Phyllis sees what I’m doing.”

8 Dr. Obermann
The female OBGYN of Carol and the young male OBGYN when Phoebe has the triplets. That is one heck of a coincidence, isn’t it. Maybe it was her son? Fanfiction!

9 Jill
Jill Goodacre, the Victoria’s Secret model Chandler meets when he’s trapped in an ATM-vestibule during a blackout and Rachel’s younger sister Jill, played by Reese Witherspoon.

10 Tony
Phoebe breaks up with Tony when Chandler tries to break up with Janice. An actor plays Joey’s twinbrother Tony Tribbiani so they can participate in a twin study. “Damn it, Carl!”

11 Mike
The name on the office door when Chandler hides on his wedding day. Joey and Ross find him and convince him to come back. Mike Hannigan, Phoebe’s boyfriend, fiancée and husband, also known as ‘Crap Bag’.

12 Kristen
Kristen Leigh, a beautiful woman who both Joey and Ross date, until they ‘lose her’. (Probably around gonorrhea.) Ross dates a Kristen to whom he tells the Europe-story. It’s the magic story you tell when you want to have sex, according to Joey. Ross doesn’t succeed in seducing his date, which is why he practiced with a videocamera rolling, inadvertently taping him and Rachel conceiving Emma.

13 Bob (three times)
Chandler has a guy at his office who has been calling him Toby for years. (This is Chris Parnell, by the way, the voice of Jerry Smith in Rick and Morty.) Phoebe says she killed her friend Bob when she went to the dentist. Luckily she didn’t kill Ugly Naked Guy. Monica and Chandler receive a hideous punchbowl from Bob and Fay Bing.

14 Julie
Joey had a date with Angela or Andrea, but it turns out it’s Julie. It’s hard to keep the names straight when you’re a serial dater like Joey. Ross dates another Julie, who he meets in China. She isn’t rachem. If you don’t know what a rachem is, you’re probably just a waitress.

15 Frank
Frank Madeo is Joey’s nametag in Barbados. Phoebe’s father, brother and nephew are called Frank, Frank Junior and Frank Junior Junior. (“Wouldn’t that be ‘Frank the Third’?” Chandler asks Alice. “Don’t get me started.” she replies.)

16 Elisabeth
Ross dates both Elisabeth Hornswoggle (Chandler can’t handle that and cracks: “Hornswoggle? You’re dating a character from Fraggle Rock?!”) and Elisabeth Stephens, one of his students, who’s father dates Rachel. This relationship ends with a waterballoon on his head.

Sidenote: Boy, Ross makes a LOT of mistakes in his lovelife, doesn’t he. Meanwhile we all thought Chandler was the loser of the three guys, but in the end Chandler is happily married with two adoptive kids and a career he finally loves. Ross the Divorcer on the other hand reaches a point at which he is dating a woman whilst living with his pregnant ex-wife Rachel, whom he still loves. Who is the real loser of the Friends in your opinion?

Other stuff

Weekend at Bernies
This movie classic is mentioned in The One With Chandlers Mom and it’s one of the answers during the big questiongame. It’s Rachel’s favorite movie, although she claims that Dangerous Liasons is her favorite. The girls lose the game and have to live in the guy’s apartment. (They get it back by just switching everything and kissing for one minute to thank Joey and Chandler.)

Bad, bad Leroy Brown
Richard asks Monica if he’s fattest or the baddest man in the whole damn town. Monica says: “Baddest. Otherwise the song would be called ‘fat, fat Leroy Brown’.” When Phoebe tries to teach Joey to play guitar, he’s miffed that she won’t let him touch an actual guitar. After he went into a guitar-store anyway, she yells: “Don’t come crying to me when everyone is sick and tired of hearing you play Bad, Bad Leroy Brown!”

Actors and actresses

Winona Rider
This actress is on Ross’ laminated freebee-list. He reserves tickets to a movie and says on the phone: “Winona Rider for six.” Which movie this is supposed to be is unclear, though. Winona Rider herself has a cameo as Melissa in The One With Rachel’s Big Kiss.

Elle McPherson
Another entry from Ross’ freebee-list, but also one of the things to think about when you need to get excited. This actress has a cameo in The One with Ross and Monica’s cousin. She keeps flipping her hair about in a sexy and hypnotic way. Ross leans in to kiss her. His cousin. Because he hadn’t had sex in a very long time. We are very opinionated about Ross’ behaviour by now.

Sean Penn
Not the Capital of Cambodia and Ursula’s fiancée.


Hook Liar Liar Jingle All The Way

Comparing Hook, Liar Liar and Jingle All The Way

We’re going to take a look at nineties legends Hook, Liar Liar and Jingle All The Way today. The nineties were chuckfull of great movies with amazing plottwists (Fight Club), awesome special effects (Titanic) and loving patriotism (Armageddon and basically every movie situated in the US.) The failing dad-trope isn’t limited to the nineties, as we could see in 2012, War of the Worlds and Interstellar, but it is one of the key components in the three movies we’ll be comparing.

Meet the three protagonaist first. In Hook (1991) we have the overweight lawyer Peter Banning, played by Robin Williams. Another lawyer, but a smooth one, is Fletcher Reede in Liar Liar (1997), played by rubberface Jim Carrey. In Jingle All The Way (1996) Arnold Schwarzenegger plays the muscley salesman Howard Langston. [Spoileralert.]

Now let’s take a look at the list of similarities.

1 Annoying sons

The failing dads in all three movies have an annoying little boy to disappoint. The kids are basically interchangeable with their nineties haircuts and whiney voices. We don’t even know their names and we don’t have to, because it doesn’t really matter. The boys have only two traits anyway: they like a certain sport and they love their daddy.

2 Perpetually late

The dads are perpetually late to everything, especially important moments for the boys. Both Banning and Langston think they can make the sportsevent of their sons, even yelling: “I’m gonna make it!” and then arrive when the event is already over. As in: way over. Fletcher has some other things on his mind (and dick) that make him late.

3 Workaholic

The reason these daddies are late all the time is, of course, their job. The workaholic father is a special kind of failing dad. Howard even says “And remember, you’re my number one costumer.” to his wife on the phone. The positive part is that the fathers are rolling in dough, which makes their quests a lot easier.

4 The promise

Peter has a catchphrase about The Big Promise (to attend the ballgame): “My word is my bond.” He missed the game, however, and when he actually uses this phrase again, the son answers: “Yeah, junkbond…” In Jingle all the way Howard promises his son to come to the parade: “I’ll be there. I promise.” Even though he eventually shows up as a part of the parade, he still breaks his original promise. Fletcher promises son Max that they can go play catch, which never happens, and he promises his ex-wife that he’ll pick up the boy, but he fails. Even when he makes ‘the mother of all promises’, he messes up.

5 Generic mothers

The mothers in all three movies are pretty, brownhaired and generic. Boring, basically. They only display one charactertrait: disappointment in the dad. None of the mothers explain what ‘workaholic’ means, though, nor do they seem to make a lot of effort to get through to the fathers. But they love their kids and that’s the most important.

6 Other fatherfigure who doesn’t mess up

In all three movies there is a substitute fatherfigure who doesn’t mess up like the biological one does. In Liar Liar the mom has a new boyfriend who’s actually a nice guy. He tries to bond with his girlfriend’s son and wants what’s best for both of them. Captain Hook, played by Dustin Hoffman, tries to win over the son just to fuck with Peter Pan, and he almost succeeds. Howard’s divorced neighbour does his best to seduce the mom and he maintains the façade of the perfect single dad. The other mothers in the street practically drool over him all the time. His son even mentions to his friend that maybe his parents should get divorced as well.

7 The gift

The boys all get a gift from their fathers. Fletcher doesn’t know what’s in the gift, because his secretary bought the ‘baseballstuff’, but Puddingbowl Haircutboy loves it. Peter gives his pocketwatch to son Jack, which functions as a kind of McGuffin in Hook. The biggest McGuffin is of course the Turboman action figure Howard keeps trying to get his hands on during Jingle All The Way. When tiny Anakin eventually gets the doll, he gives it away… because ‘he already has the real one at home.’ Really? A boy who gives away a special edition action figure? *sigh*

8 Antagonist

The antagonist in Liar Liar is probably Fletcher himself, but his bitchy boss fits the bill as well. We don’t even have to explain the bad guy in Hook, but in Jingle All The Way Howard meets a mailman he keeps bumping into. This guy is also looking for the Turboman action figure and they keep battling for the toy until the bad guy goes to jail.

9 Flying

Howard and Peter’s flying is pretty literal in Hook and Jingle All The Way. Peter Pan manages to fly eventually because he finds his ‘happy thought’ and Howard gets to don the Turboman suit with jetpack. Fletcher does a bit of flying when his stolen cart crashes at the airport.

10 Bonding

After all the danger and drama has passed, all fathers bond with their sons, bettering themselves and changing their ways. Or so we’re to believe. Banning overcomes his fear of flying and open windows, while Reede finally realises he shouldn’t take his son for granted and Langston admits he’d been neglecting his son and wife. “But noe moah!” They all live happily ever after.

Read about surprising voice-actors here.


voice actors

No way! Was that him?! Ten surprising voice actors

Some voice actors are easily recognizable, but others are a complete surprise. Especially when there is an accent involved. Let’s take a look at some voice actors you might not have known about when watching an animated movie. Sometimes the contrasts between characters is pretty funny as well.

Hugh Jackman as Canadian muscleman Wolverine versus the British accented rat Roddy, for example. We will list 10 voice actors that are famous for completely different roles in live action-movies. (You will find one non-animated exception, but that one needed to be on the list, because reasons.)

1 Hugh Jackman

X-men franchise: Wolverine / Flushed away: Roddy

voice actors

voice actors

2 Zach Galifianakis

The Hangover franchise: Alan / Lego Batman-movie: the Joker

voice actors

voice actors

3 Ian Holm

The Lord of the Rings franchise: Bilbo / Ratatouille: Chef Skinner

voice actors

voice actors

4 James McAvoy

X-men franchise: young Professor Xavier / Gnomeo and Juliet: Gnomeo

voice actors

voice actors

5 Mel Gibson

Braveheart: Sir William Wallace / Pocahontas: John Smith

voice actors

voice actors

6 Mike Meyers

Austin Powers franchise: Austin Powers / Shrek franchise: Shrek

voice actors

voice actors

7 Bruce Willis

Die Hard franchise: John McClane / Look Who’s Talking franchise: Mikey

voice actors

voice actors

8 Rowan Atkinson

Mr Bean franchise: Mr Bean / The Lion King franchise: Zazu

voice actors

voice actors

9 Dwayne Johnson

Fast and Furious franchise: Hobbs / Moana: Maui

voice actors

voice actors

10 Bradley Cooper

The Hangover franchise: Phil / Guardians of the Galaxy franchise: Rocket Raccoon

voice actors

voice actors


Celeb first names you immediately know the last name of

Whether we’re talking about stagenames or the real thing, some celebrities sport first names you’ll definitely know the last name of when you hear them. They’re mostly weird, epic or uncommon. Sometimes it’s barely even a word. But it works.

Try and see if you know the last name to go with these 15 first names. We bet you can. Want to read some weird bandnames? Click here for a list.

1 Heath. What’s the deal here? Just put an h at the end of a random adjective? What’s next, Coldh? Darkh? Weth?


2 Scarlet. This is just a colour, you know. It’s red. This woman’s name is red.


3 Kiefer. We think this sounds like an insult. “You’re such a kiefer!” Or perhaps ‘kiefing’ is a verb, making this guy a Kiefer.


4 Demi. The French word for ‘half’. That’s right. Think of Thor, the demi-god. This actually makes a nice pun with her last name, come to think of it…


5 Ashton. This one sounds like a last name. Or a car. Even shortening it to ‘Ash’ doesn’t make it any better, because you’ll think of Pokémon, Alien or the stuff left over when things burn.


6 Alanis. Do you get the feeling her parents tried to spell Atlantis, (as in: the lost city) but failed?


7 Keanu. If we didn’t know any better, we would think this name belongs to some burly Maori-guy. The real deal is quite pasty and skinny, however.


8 Charlize. Somewhere along the line the name ‘Charlie’ gained a z. It sort of looks like a typo. “We’re gonna name the baby Charlize. Oh no, I meant Charlie. Wait… we’re on to something here…”


9 Channing. This is another verb. “Do you want to go channing later?” We have no idea what ‘channing’ would be, but it sounds sort of dirty. Add the last name and you have yourself a movie title, don’t you agree?


10 Famke. Trivia: ‘famke’ is the Frisian word for ‘girl’. These parents just called their daughter ‘girl’. Perhaps they were so startled it wasn’t a boy, they couldn’t think of a real name.


11 Shia. Girl, boy, who cares. With a last name literally translating to ‘the beef’, you’re screwed anyway.


12 Elijah. Yeah, whatever. Add the last name and you have the answer to the question: What is Frodo Baggins made of?


13 Sylvester. Very Looney Tunes indeed. Especially with all that botox.


14 Benedict. Eggs, anyone? Betrayal, anyone? Most people can’t even pronounce his full name. At least he has a sense of humour about his name. You can generate your own Benedict-name by the way.


15 Macaulay. How… why… what…? Never mind, he’ll always be Kevin to us anyway.



Humans are cute! Here are 15 reasons why.

Humans are so very cute. These bipedal primate-decendant mammals have a lot of interesting habits. Let’s take a look at some of those that support our claim that humans are just. so. damn. adorable.

Here is a list of evidence.

1 Sound-mimicking

When a human hears a catchy tune or sound, it will often start to mimic it. That can even go to the point that it starts annoying itself. They are capable of creating totally new sounds and they like to entertain others with them.

2 Paterns and traditions

Humans are inclined to like paterns and traditions. They teach their young the paterns they learned from their elders, even when they make absolutely no sense. For instance they celebrate the day they were born and congratulate eachother every year bascially with being alive.

3 Nests

Most humans enjoy spending time in eachother’s nests, not to sleep, but just for fun. Often they will create a nest together, but they also visit other nests to play with eachother. They are very social mammals that like to share their nest.

4 Helpfulness

When a human notices another human in distress, it will often try to assist. Most humans are very compassionate and will try to help, even at their own risk. Especially when the body starts secreting moisture from the eyes, humans feel the need to comfort the other.

5 Water playtime

Humans aren’t aquatic mammals, but when they discover a particularly pretty waterhole, they feel the urge to get in and just play around. They even make artificial waterholes to frolic in, although they can’t hold their breath for very long.

6 Adopting creatures

Sometimes humans adopt creatures from other species into their family. Humans even raise them alongside their own young and they don’t seem to notice the obvious differences. They like playing with the creatures and touch them for comfort.

7 Decorating the body

Humans tend to colour and decorate parts of their bodies to impress the other (or the same) sex. A lot of them even permamently mark their bodies, without it serving a purpose. Sometimes they attach metal bits to their cartalidgous membranes or other parts, even when it decreases their attractiveness drastically.

8 Cocooning

When the sky goes dark and night falls, humans start getting drowsy and want to cocoon. They use fluffy, soft bedding to make a nest, in different colours and patterns. Their nests tend to be square and each has it’s own designated part of the nest.

9 Treats

Humans are really into treats. A lot of them will save treats for a later date when they are bored, or needing comfort. Some take their love of treats too far, so their bodies expand to unhealthy sizes, because they have difficulties with selfcontrol.

10 “Ow!”

Humans tend to say “Ow!”, even when they haven’t been really hurt. They say it when they think they míght have been hurt, but aren’t sure yet. It happens when they trip or bump something. The young tend to make a lot of noise to let the adults know they might have been hurt. Sometimes they even fake injuries to get attention!

11 Space exploration

Humans are very curious creatures, so they try to explore space. They haven’t gone very far, but they’ve found rocks and they are very excited when they think they found something new. The concept of ‘infinity’ is something humans are still incapabele of understanding.

12 “Sorry”

Saying sorry for something totally involuntary is a recurring habit. They say it to eachother, for instance when gas leaves their body. They excuse themselves when they sneeze, but congratulate others on their sneezes.

13 Excitement for others

When humans are competing eachother, some of them can get really excited. They start cheering and clapping for the competing ones, even though they’re not doing anything but watch themselves. When their favorite people lose the game, they can get very upset.

14 Collecting stuff

Humans are collectors. They want to have a lot of things in their environments, even if it doesn’t really serve a purpose. They just like to look at things they own. Owning a lot of stuff usually makes the human content and proud.

15 Odd leaders

Humans select weird people to lead them. Quite often the leader actively ruines the territory it is charged with leading. Sometimes the leader turns into a powerhungry dictator, but humans have been selecting odd leaders for thousands of years. They appear to enjoy complaining about the leaders they have chosen themselves.

Rick and Morty

10 awesome characters from Rick and Morty (with quotes)

Animation series Rick and Morty from Adult Swim is known for many wacky characters, with names ranging from hilarious to downright crazy. Let’s take a look at some of the most awesome characters that have been introduced in the two-and-a-half seasons of this amazing show. We will even add quotes as a bonus! Do you know all these characters?

Warning: major spoiler-alert if you’re not up to date with Rick and Morty. Duh. Kudos for Dan Harmon and Justin Roiland for bringing all these funny-as-hell characters into our lives!

1 Abradolf Lincler

Rick and Morty

Abradolf at Rick’s party

“Prepare to be emancipated from your own inferior genes!”
Abradolf Lincler was an experiment of Rick’s, combining the DNA of both Abraham Lincoln and Adolf Hitler to create a morally neutral superleader. This did not work out, of course, for Abradolf struggled with his duality until his untimely demise.

2 Mr. Meeseeks

Rick and Morty

Jerry and Mr. Meeseeks

“I’m Mr. Meeseeks! Look at me!”
Meeseeks are creatures that spring into being from a Meeseeks Box to fulfill a singular purpose, after which they stop existing. Rick advises Beth, Jerry and Summer to keep their requests simple. Beth and Summer’s Meeseeks vanish quite quickly, but things get out of hand when chronically mediocre Jerry asks to get two strokes off his golf game. Chaos ensues.

3 Risotto Groupon

Rick and Morty

Jerry and Risotto Groupon

“My kingdom was usurped by force with weapons and technologies supplied by your father-in-law!”
Assistant general manager of a restaurant on a planet where you can’t die, Risotto Groupon tries to get Jerry to assist in the assassination of Rick.

4 Mr. Poopybutthole

Rick and Morty

Rick and Mr. Poopybutthole

“Ooh, wee!”
We dedicated a whole post to this zany character. Read about the mystery behind his existence HERE! The bananalike creature is annoyingly upbeat, says ‘Ooh, wee’ a lot and might only exist in a parallel universe.

5 Mrs. Pancakes

Rick and Morty

Mr. Goldenfold watching The Days and Nights of Mrs. Pancakes

“You don’t know me!”
This leading lady in a television show called The Days and Nights of Mrs. Pancakes, is a sassy gal. That’s about it.

6 Morty Jr.

Rick and Morty

Morty and Morty Jr.

“Destruction, domination!”
In the episode Raising Gazorpazorp, Morty has some fun with a sexrobot from the planet Gazorpazorp. Out pops his mutant-son, Morty Jr. This Gazorpazorpian hybrid loves death and violence, but Morty manages to calm his rapidly growing pink monstrosity down with the song Handy Hands. Later, Morty Jr. publishes his novel ‘My horrible father’.

7 Birdperson

Rick and Morty

Tammy and Birdperson

“Morty, you appear to be dying.”
Being Rick’s best friend means having comitted numerous atrocities in the name of freedom, basically rendering you a fugutive. Birdperson is a calm, collected, half-bird, half-person. In his mate-melding ceremony to Summer’s friend Tammy, shit hits the fan when the Galactic Federation bursts in.

8 Squanchy

Rick and Morty

Squanchy at Birdperson’s wedding

“Rick! Sqauncy party, bro!”
Squanchy is a Squanch from the planet Squanch, where the Birdpeople live. He likes to squanch and he can use an elixer in one of his teeth to become a kind of Squanch-hulk. (Yup, the word ‘squanch’ is basically a form of ‘smurf’.) Rick: “Squachy-culture is more contextual than literal. You just say what’s in your squanch and people understand.”

9 Million Ants

Rick and Morty

Million Ants at the Vindicator’s meeting


“A million times better!”
As part of the Vindicators, Million Ants is a superhero comprised of… a million ants. After having an affair with Supernova, his story ends rather drastic in the season three episode Vindicators 3: the Return of Worldender. A colony can’t function without a queen, you know.

10 King Flippy Nips

Rick and Morty

King Flippy Nips from Pluto

“You really gave it to those guys at NASA.”
Being the king of Pluto must be a tough job. In Something Ricked This Way Comes, Jerry proclaims Pluto is a planet, in stead of a celestial dwarf. Morty and him get abducted because King Flippy Nips wants to use ‘Earth scientist’ Jerry’s statement to keep his loyal subjects satisfied. (He made the list because of his cool name, cute appearance and ruthlesness.)