Florida residents told to prepare for evacuation. All of them.

Yes, that’s right. All of Florida’s residents are supposed to prepare for evacuation. Twenty. Million. People.

Of course, it makes sense: Irma is huge. As Governor Rick Scott points out: Irma is wider than the entire state of Florida. Looking at the devestation it caused in the Caribbean (we’re told Jack Sparrow and his Kraken were quite impressed Irma did that without even a single drop of rum), it makes a lot of sense to not be there when the full force of this agent of destruction is projected to hit Florida head on!

But how on earth can Florida prepare and evecuate everyone in less than two days? Is there some teleportation there we don’t know about? And if so, couldn’t it just… beam up Irma?